Tag Archives: Speaking the truth in love

“It is certainly indulgence to ourselves that makes us aggravate other men’s faults” by Hugh Binning

Charity beareth all things, believeth all things, hopeth all things, endureth all things.” (1 Corinthians 13:7)

Charity beareth all things.’ By nature we are undaunted heifers, we cannot bear anything patiently; but charity is accustomed to the yoke, to the yoke of reproaches and injuries from others, to a burden of other men’s infirmities and failings.

We would all be borne upon others’ shoulders, but we cannot put our own shoulders under other men’s burdens, according to that royal law of Christ (Rom. 15:1), ‘We then that are strong ought to bear the infirmities of the weak, and not to please ourselves.’ And, ‘Bear ye one another’s burdens, and so fulfil the law of Christ‘ (Gal. 6:2), that is, the law of love, without question.

Charity believeth all things.’ Our nature is malignant and wicked, and therefore most suspicious and jealous, and apt to take all in the worst part; but charity has much candour and humanity in it, and can believe well of every man, and believe all things, as far as truth will permit.

It knows that grace can be beside a man’s sins; it knows that it itself is subject to similar infirmities; therefore, it is not a rigid and censorious judge; it allows as much latitude to others as it would desire of others.

It is true that it is not blind and ignorant: it is judicious, and has eyes that can discern between colours.

Credit omnia credenda, sperat omnia speranda. It hopes all things that are hopeful, and believes all things that are believable.”

If love has not sufficient evidence, yet she believes if there are some probabilities to the contrary, as well as for it; the weight of charity inclines to the better part, and so casts the balance of hope and persuasion; yet being sometimes deceived, she has reason to be watchful and wise; for ‘the simple believeth every word.’ (Prov. 14:15)

If charity cannot have ground of believing any good, yet it hopes still: Qui non est hodie, cras magis aptus erit, (‘He who is not amenable today, will be more so tomorrow.‘) says charity; and therefore it is patient and gentle, waiting on all, ‘if peradventure God may give them repentance to the acknowledging of the truth‘ (2 Tim. 2:25).

Charity would account it both atheism and blasphemy, to say such a man cannot, will not, find mercy.

But to pronounce of such as have been often approved in the conscience of all, and sealed in many hearts, that they will never find mercy, that they have no grace, because of some failings in practice and differences from us, it would not be insobriety, but madness.

It is certainly love and indulgence to ourselves that makes us aggravate other men’s faults to such a height; self-love looks on other men’s failings through a multiplying or magnifying glass; but she puts her own faults behind her back.

Non videt quod in mantica qua a tergo est (‘She does not see what is in the bag behind her.’); therefore she can suffer much in herself but nothing in others; and certainly much self-forbearance and indulgence can spare little for others.

But charity is just contrary, she is most rigid on her own behalf, will not pardon herself easily; knows no revenge but what is spoken of (2 Cor. 7:11), self-revenge; and has no indignation but against herself.

Thus she can spare much candour and forbearance for others, and has little or no indignation left behind to consume on others.”

–Hugh Binning, Christian Love (Carlisle, PA: Banner of Truth, 1735/2022), 24-26.

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“We are not to be always going about the world searching out heresies like terrier dogs sniffing for rats” by Charles Spurgeon

“We should avoid everything like the ferocity of bigotry.

There are religious people about, who, I have no doubt, were born of a woman, but appear to have been suckled by a wolf.

I have done them no dishonour: were not Romulus and Remus, the founders of the city of Rome, so fed?

Some warlike men of this order have had power to found dynasties of thought; but human kindness and brotherly love consort better with the kingdom of Christ.

We are not to be always going about the world searching out heresies, like terrier dogs sniffing for rats, and to be always so confident of one’s own infallibility, that we erect ecclesiastical stakes at which to roast all who differ from us.

And, dear brethren, we must acquire certain moral faculties and habits, as well as put aside their opposites. He will never do much for God who has not integrity of spirit.

If we be guided by policy, if there be any mode of action for us but that which is straightforward, we shall make shipwreck before long.

Resolve, dear brethren, that you can be poor, that you can be despised, that you can lose life itself, but that you cannot do a crooked thing.

For you, let the only policy be honesty.

May you also possess the grand moral characteristic of courage.

By this we do not mean impertinence, impudence, or self-conceit; but real courage to do and say calmly the right thing, and to go straight on at all hazards, though there should be none to give you a good word.

I am astonished at the number of Christians who are afraid to speak the truth to their brethren.

I thank God I can say this, there is no member of my church, no officer of the church, and no man in the world to whom I am afraid to say before his face what I would say behind his back.

Under God I owe my position in my own church to the absence of all policy, and the habit of saying what I mean.

The plan of making things pleasant all round is a perilous as well as a wicked one. If you say one thing to one man, and another to another, they will one day compare notes and find you out, and then you will be despised.

The man of two faces will sooner or later be the object of contempt, and justly so.

Now, above all things, avoid that. If you have anything that you feel you ought to say about a man, let the measure of what you say be this— ‘How much dare I say to his face?’

We must not allow ourselves a word more in censure of any man living.

If that be your rule, your courage will save you from a thousand difficulties, and win you lasting respect.”

–Charles H. Spurgeon, The Sword and Trowel: 1874 (London: Passmore & Alabaster, 1874), 78-79.

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“A half-truth masquerading as the whole truth” by J.I. Packer

“A half-truth masquerading as the whole truth becomes a complete untruth.”

–J.I. Packer, “‘Saved by His Precious Blood’: An Introduction to John Owen’s The Death of Death in the Death of Christ,” A Quest for Godliness: The Puritan Vision of the Christian Life (Wheaton, IL: Crossway, 1990), 126.

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“Love should pervade the whole tone of our Ministry” by Charles Bridges

“Love is the grand distinctive mark of our office. The Christian Pastor, of all men in the world, should have an affectionate heart.

We set forth a most tender Father, a bleeding Savior, and a faithful Comforter. ‘Speaking the truth in love’ is in a few words the most complete description of our office.

Love should pervade the whole tone of our Ministry.”

–Charles Bridges, The Christian Ministry (Edinburgh: Banner of Truth Trust, 1830/2005), 333, 338.

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“Use very hard arguments and very soft words” by Charles Spurgeon

“In all probability, sensible conversation will sometimes drift into controversy, and here many a good man runs upon a snag. The sensible minister will be particularly gentle in argument. He, above all men, should not make the mistake of fancying that there is force in temper, and power in speaking angrily.

A heathen who stood in a crowd in Calcutta, listening to a missionary disputing with a Brahmin, said he knew which was right though he did not understand the language—he knew that he was in the wrong who lost his temper first. For the most part, that is a very accurate way of judging.

Try to avoid debating with people. State your opinion and let them state theirs. If you see that a stick is crooked, and you want people to see how crooked it is, lay a straight rod down beside it; that will be quite enough.

But if you are drawn into controversy, use very hard arguments and very soft words. Frequently you cannot convince a man by tugging at his reason, but you can persuade him by winning his affections.

The other day I had the misery to need a pair of new boots, and though I bade the fellow make them as large as canoes, I had to labour fearfully to get them on. With a pair of boot-hooks I toiled like the men on board the vessel with Jonah, but all in vain.

Just then my friend put in my way a little French chalk, and the work was done in a moment. Wonderfully coaxing was that French chalk.

Gentlemen, always carry a little French chalk with you into society, a neat packet of Christian persuasiveness, and you will soon discover the virtues of it.”

–Charles H. Spurgeon, Lectures to My Students: A Selection from Addresses Delivered to the Students of the Pastors’ College, Metropolitan Tabernacle (Carlisle, PA: Banner of Truth, 1875/2008), 201-202.

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